It's late. I'm tired. It seems this is the time of day comes again too soon. Life on repeat. I'm realizing all that I haven't done, and will seem too late for tomorrow. How poetic.
I keep praying to be content in the mundane. To be where God has me, even if I don't feel all that alive. Alive. You know that feeling like you are truly ripped to the bone, where you're desperate for Jesus? I know it's a dangerous prayer. I know it's asking for trouble.
But I don't want to search for this feeling unless the Lord wants it for me. I want to live like he's the only thing I need. Not based off of fleeting emotions, but of authenticity. I don't want to live for the experience; I want to live because their is no other way.
I want to be raw. I want to be true. God make in me a authenticity for you that I can't control. One that is not dictated by how I feel, but of who you are.